Noticing the different ways people can start or try to start an interaction with someone.
Exploring what it can look and feel like when an invitation to connect is turned down.
Thinking about how people might read the signals that someone is or is not open to an interaction.
Noticing that there is no single right way to exit a social situation, and that people find their own approaches.
Exploring the gap between how we hope an interaction will go and how it actually unfolds.
Homer Simpson is in the driveway next to his neighbour Ned Flanders' hedge. Homer pushes through the hedge and appears in the Flanders' yard, where Ned and his family are spending time together. Homer invites Ned to play a round of mini golf. Ned makes an excuse and says "no". Homer registers the refusal. Without saying anything, he slowly and smoothly backs all the way into the hedge until he disappears from view.
• What did you notice about the way Homer started the interaction with Ned? How did Ned respond?
• How do you think Ned felt saying no to Homer?
• What do you think Homer was feeling when Ned said "no"?
• What did Homer's way of leaving tell you about how he was feeling?
• Tell me about a time you wanted to join in with something and found it hard to know how to start.
• What are some ways you have seen people join or leave a conversation?
• What helps you know when someone wants to talk or wants to be left alone?
The questions within this guide are designed to open dialogue and facilitate discussion around the relevant topics. It is up to the user to adapt as needed to best suit the person they are supporting. A neuroaffirming approach was central to the design of these resources and remains essential to their application. This means recognising and respecting the diverse ways people think, communicate, and experience the world, ensuring all conversations are led with curiosity, respect, and without judgement. These resources are a starting point. Trust your knowledge of the person you are supporting to shape the conversation from there.
For access to playback speed, transcripts or closed captions, please click the video title in the top left of the player to access the Youtube source where these controls are provisioned.
We are always looking to grow and improve this resource and would love to hear from you. Whether you have a suggestion for a clip or topic, a question about your subscription, or feedback to share, please do not hesitate to reach out.
Please also see our knowledge base for further information.
